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Carolyn Hax Her syndicated column is billed as advice with attitude and a grounded set of values. |
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Also featuring
If you've missed reading Dr. Joyce Brothers and the Rev. Billy Graham in the newspaper, their columns are now available online.
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Reader blog: Sanctuary
A mental health blog from Seattle psychotherapist Mara Applebaum.
· Paradox
· Something beautiful
· Fronting
Reader blog: Singled OutAppreciate first, make assumptions later
Carolyn Hax: "Washington" is openly gay but resents a "Friendly Mom" co-worker's efforts to fix her up with other gay men she knows.
Bible says a lot about mothers
Dear Dr. Graham: We're expecting our first baby in a few months, and to be honest, I'm scared to death about being a mother.
For children, learning languages can start very early
"F.C." worries that trying to raise her daughter as trilingual will actually delay her language skills development; "W.P.'s" mother makes her feel terrible about being overweight.
FRIDAY, MAY 9, 2008
Hurry up after first divorce? No, wait
Carolyn Hax: A reader writes: "I am a 25-year-old divorcee. I've realized there were many warning signs that I ignored before and during my marriage. I've grown and learned a lot from it. I've now been dating a great guy for the past six months and am very much in love. I am happy and to be honest, it freaks me out!"
Fiance's inexperience in relationships prompts concern
A reader writes: "My fiance is a few years younger than I, and a lot more inexperienced in relationships."
Turn to prayer when family is not on God's path
A reader writes: "I'm the only one in my family who's a Christian, and every weekend they all go out drinking while I stay at home watching television by myself. They just laugh at me when I try to talk to them about Jesus. I can't wait to move out, but I'm still in school so I don't have much choice right now. How should I deal with this?"
THURSDAY, MAY 8, 2008
Sometimes, money does solve problems
Carolyn Hax: A reader writes: "I have two daughters in their late 20s. Daughter No. 1 (older) is getting divorced, trying to complete GED, has lousy job/poor pay and a little girl (my sweet grandbaby). No. 2 is getting married in May, with satin dress, tuxes, the works."
Return to school feels pointless
A reader writes: "I quit my job in the online advertising business to go back to school and get a degree that will allow me to make more money and move up in the hierarchy within this industry. I'm finishing my first year of a two-year program, and I hate it."
Hatred and bitterness eat away at the soul
A reader writes: "I know you'll say it's wrong to be filled with hate and bitterness, but I had a very rough time growing up, and I just can't help it. God must have hated me very much to put me through all that, and I'm sure He still hates me because of my attitude. What would you say to someone like me?"
WEDNESDAY, MAY 7, 2008
Cure a control freak by repeating 'no'
Carolyn Hax: A reader writes: "I have a friend who is pressuring me (and others) to fix her brother up on dates. He seems nice but I know his story and it involves professional disgrace, financial problems and depression."
Test your knowledge of mourning
Grief and bereavement are natural, healthy responses to feelings of loss. This quiz will test your knowledge of some of the aspects of mourning.
God forgives all sins except rejection of forgiveness
A reader writes: "How can I know if God has really forgiven me? I did something several years ago that was very wrong, and I've confessed it repeatedly to God and begged for His forgiveness, but I still feel guilty. Maybe I have committed the unforgivable sin. I worry about this all the time."
TUESDAY, MAY 6, 2008
Don't miss a chance to know your nephews
Carolyn Hax: A reader writes: "I'm setting up a trust for my family after I die, specifically for my nieces. I also have two nephews. I routinely hear from the girls by e-mail or letters, and always after I send them a gift. From the boys, never. Am I obligated to leave the boys something?"
What to do about postpartum depression
A reader writes: "I'm a single mom, and have been working two jobs so I can save up money. I just had my second baby, and now that she's born and is healthy, I feel like I don't have any purpose."
Bible's message is complete
A reader writes: "How do we know that the books we have in the Bible are the only ones that are supposed to be there? A man I work with belongs to a religious group that claims the Bible wasn't complete until their founder discovered some additional books that God revealed to him."
MONDAY, MAY 5, 2008
This topic shouldn't be off the table
Carolyn Hax: A reader writes: "I lost my lifelong best friend as she waited for an organ donation that never came. Do I have the right to broach such an intensely personal decision with my boyfriend? How do I approach it without putting him on the defensive?"
Growing unsatisfied with lifelong career
A reader writes: "I've been a flight attendant for almost 20 years, and up until now I've really loved my job. I don't know what has changed, but in the past few months I've been very short-tempered and felt incapable of dealing with people -- and in my line of work, dealing with people is an all-important skill."
Because God made us, our souls will never die
A reader writes: "What happens to us when we die? My uncle (who doesn't believe in God) says that's the end for us, and we might as well get used to it. But I know this isn't what people like you believe."
SUNDAY, MAY 4, 2008
It's your decision, not your parents'
Carolyn Hax: Dear Carolyn: I have been working in a career field for the past four years, since I graduated from college. For the past two years, I have been unhappy.
SATURDAY, MAY 3, 2008
Be sure of the reasons for contacting Dad
Carolyn Hax: A reader asks, "When is it OK to contact an absentee father who mom says was abusive to her?"
God's true love bolsters yours in trying times
A reader writes: How can she help her husband cope with the lasting effects of drug use?
Speak to new stepfather as fellow adult
A reader wants to know how to adjust to living with new stepfather and his two children.
FRIDAY, MAY 2, 2008
Men aren't immune to abusive spouses
Carolyn Hax: A reader writes: "My brother has been married for 15 years. Two kids. My sister-in-law has all the control -- brother's and kids' schedules, (over)spending, etc. Her often-heinous attitude has all members of her family and his, who support this family however possible, in various levels of exasperation. What can he do to change the situation? "
Prayer alone may not treat depression
A reader writes: "Is it a sin to be depressed?"
No need to change because guys make mistakes
A reader writes: "It started in high school and I thought it would stay there, but now I'm in my early 20s and it doesn't seem to go away. Every time I talk to a guy, I give him the proverbial wrong impression. I don't really think I should change my behavior, but then again, I am tired of unwelcome advances. Is it me, or them?"
THURSDAY, MAY 1, 2008
Obese woman should make the issue private
Carolyn Hax: A reader writes: "I have been told my whole life that I was fat. My mother spent her life beating herself up for having hips and breasts, and it's only in recent years that I've been able to see past this inherited self-loathing."
Sit down and figure out a plan for retirement years
A reader writes: "You see, I am 60 now, and though I have a lovely wife, and sons and grandchildren, I can't seem to find my place anymore. I have had a few health issues, so I can no longer play golf. What shall I do with the rest of my life ... or shall I say, how do I stay interested in this world?"
Pray for our nation and our world
A reader writes: "Does it really do any good to pray for things like our nation and world peace? I get very discouraged when I read the headlines every day, and it doesn't seem to me like our prayers are doing much good."
WEDNESDAY, APRIL 30, 2008
Husband is the key to handling in-laws
Carolyn Hax: A reader writes: "Our relationship with my in-laws was tense even before our marriage, but got really bad after our first child was born. We have not seen or spoken to them together for over a year."
Test your knowledge of 'helicopter parent'
Take this quiz and see what you know about the hovering human known as the "helicopter parent."
Look for God's lesson in your divorce
A reader writes: "Three months after my divorce, I rushed into another marriage because I was so lonely, but it was a big mistake. I won't go into the details, but the marriage is over now and hopefully, I've learned something. Please warn people to be very careful before they remarry. I wish I had."
TUESDAY, APRIL 29, 2008
Stop working over hardworking BF
Carolyn Hax: A reader writes: "My boyfriend works. A lot. He works late most nights, including Fridays and some weekends. He is in a demanding field and I know there is some degree of "paying his dues" at this stage. But I also get the sense that some of the extra hours are self-imposed."
It's time to let child pick his own friends
A reader writes: "I have always helped my 8-year-old choose his friends. He's a pretty easy kid, so I was happy to find that he enjoyed play dates with the sons and daughters of the women in my social circle. Now, for some reason, he has chosen to cozy up to a boy whose mother I don't know, and who is really bossy."
God helps carry the burdens no one else does
A reader writes: "I know you answer letters fairly often from people who are in prison, but I wish you'd say something to encourage those of us who are the members of their families. Having my husband in prison is the hardest thing I've ever had to face, and yet no one seems to care."
MONDAY, APRIL 28, 2008
She's breaking down, he's not listening
Carolyn Hax: A reader writes: "Love my husband, but he is the only one who is not noticing how stressed I am and will not do anything to help. And I'm not talking about me dropping subtle hints that he's not noticing."
Sometimes a little anger can go a long way
A reader writes: "work in a very intense law office. I always pride myself on staying cool when it comes to trying a case before a jury, but my law partner is the exact opposite."
Use God's gifts to the best of your ability
A reader writes: "Years ago, I was diagnosed with a mild learning disability, and I've always had special struggles with reading. Does God understand this? I know you tell people they ought to read their Bible every day but I just can't do it."
SUNDAY, APRIL 27, 2008
Dad might learn from alone time with toddler
Carolyn Hax: Dear Carolyn: Our toddler is getting to the into-everything-all-the-time stage. I think we should install drawer locks, remove things that can break/cause harm, and let him explore most, but not all other things. My husband thinks he just needs to learn not to touch.
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Need some practical advice? You can find the columns "Dear Prudence," "Ask Harriette," and "Heloise" in the P-I. None are available online.


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