By WINDA BENEDETTI SEATTLE POST-INTELLIGENCER REPORTER
You can find anything and everything on the World Wide Web -- CDs, clothes, cars, rubber vomit, custom-made vampire fangs. So why shouldn't the click of a mouse deliver a date, a new friendship or perhaps true love?
As it turns out, thousands of people are turning to their computers in search of just that. Type the words "love," "dating" and "personals" into any Internet search engine and you'll discover enough cyberdating Web services to match up an army of lonely singles.
Seattle is the real-world home to several of these sites -- singlesinseattle.com, kiss.com and singleQuest.com among them.
"As more and more people are going online, they're becoming more open to the whole online dating scene," says Brian Rauschenbach of kiss.com.
Kiss.com opened its Web doors in December 1994 and focuses on personal ads with pictures. Rauschenbach says about half a million users from around the world have posted personal profiles since the site started and approximately 3,000 post new ads every day.
Although Internet dating still suffers from a certain stigma -- seen either as an extension of online pornography or as a last resort for the desperate -- those who run cyberdating sites say normal, healthy people make up the majority of the clientele.
In fact, many sites promote themselves not only as a way to meet a potential mate, but simply as a means of connecting with other humans -- say, finding a workout partner or someone to go skiing with.
"In Seattle, especially, it's hard to meet people," says Joel Jamieson one of four University of Washington students who started singlesin
seattle.com. "I wanted to put a new spin on personals, so it's not so cheesy and desperate -- just kind of an all-around guide to dating and having fun in Seattle."
"We want it to be a supplement to a healthy social life," says co-founder Dante Martin.
Hence, singlesinseattle.com has a hipster look and feel, with a martini-glass décor and understated colors. "You won't find any little hearts or a bunch of stories about 'How I Found the Love of My Life,'" Martin says. "We're more like, 'Here's a place on the Internet where everybody is single and everybody is interested in getting to know other people.'"
The guys (none older than 22) run the site out of the Psi Upsilon fraternity house near the UW campus, with help from nextstudio.com, a Seattle-based commercial Web design firm. Since their site opened in September, nearly 3,000 people have joined as members.
The challenge is to make a very personal connection with someone using a very impersonal method. But the nice thing about cyberdating is this: "What you are inside gets a chance to shine without getting overpowered by what you are outside," says Parry Aftab, a leading cyberlawyer.
Absent is the physical sizing-up that accompanies most initial encounters. Words make the first impression. E-mailed conversations allow people to judge each other based on their thoughts and feelings, rather than on the clothes they wear and the hair products they use.
Plus, it's anonymous and therefore freeing.
"You can meet people and still keep yourself private until you're ready to take that next step," says Cristal Clopton, project manager for
hometownpersonals.com. This national site, based in Dallas, features separate sections for 50 cities around the country. Seattlepersonals.com is one of the more popular ones.
"The sad part is, there's not as many women," Clopton says. "The majority of people on these sites are men."
Both hometownpersonals.com and singlesin
seattle.com report that only about one third of their clientele are women. That makes cyberdating a more difficult proposition for guys, who may contact numerous personal ads only to get little or no response from the women.
"These women are getting hits constantly. They're bombarded because there are so many men," Clopton says.
The guys at singlesinseattle.com plan to start a marketing campaign to draw in more women. "We want to show women that this really is a place to meet people. It's not just a sex site. It's not for horny old men and couples wanting to swing."
Kiss.com recently ran a marketing campaign to draw in women -- with excellent success. They now boast 45 percent men and 55 percent women.
And, Rauschenbach says, "Where the women are, the men will come."
P-I reporter Winda Benedetti can be reached at 206-448-8223 or windabenedetti@seattle-pi.com.
