This holiday tale won't stand the test of time

Christmas is a family holiday, which is a problem for young, rich and empty loner Drew Latham (Ben Affleck), a man who has peddled his insincerity into a lucrative advertising career and a lonely existence.

MOVIE REVIEW

SURVIVING CHRISTMAS

DIRECTOR: Mike Mitchell

CAST: Ben Affleck, James Gandolfini, Christina Applegate, Catherine O'Hara

RUNNING TIME: 99 minutes

RATING: PG-13 for sexual content, language and a brief drug reference

WHERE: Bella Bottega 11, Cinema 17, Crossroads 8, Everett 9, Factoria, Galaxy Tacoma 6, Galleria 11, Gateway 8, Grand Cinemas, Issaquah 9, Kirkland Parkplace 6, Longston Place 14, Marysville Cinema 14, Meridian 16, Monroe 12, Mountlake 9, Parkway Plaza 12, Renton Village, Woodinville 12

GRADE: C

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For reasons that exist only in Hollywood comedies, he can't face his family. For reasons that become apparent as the film wears on, he hasn't a single friend willing to invite him to their own family gathering. So he does what any poor little rich jerk would: he leases one. And not just any family, either. He rents out his childhood home and puts the screeching, barely communicative family who now owns it under contract.

Drew reverts to pre-adolescent arrogance but never loses his adult guile. He tosses his wealth around and trots out phrases like "breach of contract" behind plastic smiles to leverage his reluctant stock company -- grumbling man-of-the-house Tom (James Gandolfini), snippy, sarcastic wife Alicia (Catherine O'Hara) and porn-obsessed little brother Brian -- to play the loving family of his idealized childhood holiday fantasy.

I've never understood Affleck's leading man status. I find him smarmy and insincere on screen. That happens to make him perfect casting here: the spoiled prince calling the tunes and making the hapless dysfunctional family dance through minor humiliations to earn their small fortune. When eldest sister Alicia (Christina Applegate) arrives home and refuses to play along, Affleck's dismissive barbs are tossed off with self-involved ease, like modern royalty snubbing someone beneath his contempt.

This is pseudo-cynical comedy, however, not social satire. All the sharp corners are smoothed over and what's left is little more than a big screen sitcom. By the time the high society parents of Drew's materialistic girlfriend collide with his working-class faux family, the inevitable disasters are as predictable as they are labored.

There are lessons to be learned, hearts to be warmed and fractured relationships to be healed. Affleck is never much fun when he plays contrite and sincere and his transformation (not to mention the real tale behind his absent family) is as phony as the predetermined happy ending found in the comedy wreckage.

Sean Axmaker is a movie reviewer and freelance film writer based in Seattle. He can be reached via e-mail at seanax@hotmail.com.